6419 —שאלות על מנהגי אבלות, קדיש, ושמות

B"H, 26 Tammuz, 5718.

Brooklyn.

Havavac"h iy"a nu"n oseik b'tzt"z mo"h Yitzchak David

Shalom u'Vrachah!

In response to his letter from the 11th of Tammuz, the eve of the Day of Redemption, the redemption of the Rebbe Rayatz, leader of Israel.

At an auspicious time, all those you write about will be mentioned at the holy resting place of the Rebbe Rayatz zatzal according to the content of your letter.

In response to your questions:

a) Regarding erecting a monument: Outside Eretz Yisrael some wait twelve months; in Eretz Yisrael the custom is to erect it after thirty days. In my opinion, one should not wait a year—especially in Eretz Yisrael where the custom is as above. Even outside Eretz Yisrael there are many who object to waiting a year, as explained in various sources (Mןinchas Elazar vol. 3 sec. 37; Kol Bo on mourning by Rabbi Greenwald; and others).

b) Regarding the name Mendel: It is known that Menachem Mendel equals tzt"z in gematria, and I have always written Mendel according to this gematria. However, it is obvious that everyone may keep their name as they wish; it depends on their signature. In some cases this also applies when being called up to the Torah. In your case as well, one should look at the signature and act accordingly.

c) Regarding the number of Kaddishim: It is correct that there should be sixteen Kaddishes daily. This is connected with what is explained in Zohar I:62b about Kaddish having an effect for an hour and a half—so sixteen Kaddaishim cover twenty-four hours of the day. You asked how this is possible on Shabbos and similar days; it seems you are unaware of our custom to study Mishnayos after every prayer—that is, three times daily.

d) The custom for a mourner to lead prayers on Friday night for Mizmor L'David is not practiced among us. For general customs regarding yahrzeit and Kaddish see the pamphlets listed below.

e) Regarding studying Mishnayos: What I have heard is that one studies according to the letters of the deceased's name but not their parents' names.

f) You asked: When a letter appears more than once in a name, does one chapter suffice for all instances or must there be as many chapters as repeated letters? Although I have not found this stated explicitly, since a name is a conduit connecting soul and body (see Shaar HaYichud VeHaEmunah by Admur HaZaken at the beginning of ch. 12), each letter is part of that conduit—so one should study a chapter for each letter individually. However, in my opinion it need not be different chapters; one may repeat the same chapter multiple times.

g) You asked which takes precedence: studying Mishnayos by name letters or following sequential order? These are separate matters—the letter corresponds to connecting soul and body as explained elsewhere regarding drawing down the soul from its source; whereas sequential study fulfills the mitzvah completely by finishing a tractate or order etc. See also Shaar HaYichud VeHaEmunah there about higher power and general vitality etc., especially since order in Torah Sheba'al Peh itself is Torah—as our Sages say in various places: "the Tanna comes from such-and-such tractate."

h) Regarding reading from the Torah and being called up for Maftir: I heard two instructions from my father-in-law regarding this when I was in mourning after my father z"l; however due to personal reasons I read from the Torah only at Minchah on Shabbos and on Mondays and Thursdays.

i) Regarding your question about study order: In my view both types of learning are relevant here—studying Mishnayos by name letters (letters of soul), and studying inner dimensions of Torah (Ilanah D'Chayei). Through such study "the spirit of impurity will be removed from earth," "and Hashem will wipe away tears from every face," as explained by Moshe Rabbeinu (Raya Mehimna) (Zohar III:152b). The inner dimension of Torah is Ilanah D'Chayei as explained in Zohar—and after Adam's sin which brought death into the world "when he stretches out his hand and takes also from the Tree of Life he will live forever." The advantage of our Torah—Torat Chaim—is that it aligns with Divine will so even Etz HaDaas becomes Etz HaChaim—transforming darkness to light and bitterness to sweetness.

j) Although you did not mention this explicitly—you surely give charity before morning prayers and before Minchah during weekdays. This too relates especially to these matters—as it says "charity saves...", whose inner meaning applies even after passing away; likewise it is clear from Jewish custom—which itself has force of law—that when mentioning souls we mention charity. As our Sages taught (Mordechai based on Sifri end of Parshas Shoftim).

Blessings for good news in all discussed above—and surely it goes without saying to recall our ruling that "whoever is lenient regarding mourning—the halachah follows him." See also Orach Chaim end Hilchos Lulav.

Summary

The Rebbe provides detailed guidance on mourning customs such as monument erection timing, use of names in Mishnah study, number of daily Kaddishes, yahrzeit practices, learning priorities, charity before prayer, and emphasizes leniency within halachah regarding mourning observance.