Torah and Tea – Emor 5780
This week’s parsha—Torah portion—is called Emor. The reason for this name is that the portion begins with the words, “Vayomer Hashem el Moshe, Emor”—“And Hashem said to Moshe, say”. If we look closely, Emor is actually part of a sentence: Emor el hakohanim—“say to the Kohanim”. Most of the laws that begin this parsha are directed to the Kohanim—the priests. Yet, the portion is simply called Emor, not Emor el hakohanim. This highlights the significance of the word itself and the power of speech.
We are also in the month of Iyar, which is unique in that every single day of the month we perform a special mitzvah—commandment. What is that mitzvah? The counting of the Omer. While we count the Omer in Nisan and Sivan as well, Iyar is the only month in which every day is counted. Iyar is also an acronym for Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov, and Rachel—the four legs of the merkavah—the Divine chariot, as explained in Kabbalah. Additionally, Iyar stands for Ani Hashem Rofecha—“I am Hashem, your healer”. Especially in difficult times, we must remain strong, encouraged, and hopeful, trusting that things will turn out for the best.
This Friday is Pesach Sheni—the second Passover. It falls exactly one month after the first, on the 14th of Iyar. On the 14th of Nisan, the korban Pesach—Paschal sacrifice—was brought. If someone missed the first opportunity, even deliberately, the Torah gives them a second chance with Pesach Sheni. We’ll discuss this, as well as L’ag baOmer, which falls on the 18th of Iyar. But first, let’s focus on the Omer.
The word Omer means “to say”. The power of speech is extraordinary. Words can cause tremendous damage and pain, but they can also help, encourage, and uplift. Sometimes people are stingy with their words—they don’t say thank you, or offer a yashar koach—“well done”. Yet, words of strength and encouragement can accomplish so much. In education, whether with children or adults, we may think positively about someone, but unless we express it, it has little effect. On the negative side, speaking lashon hara—negative speech—is so severe that the Talmud teaches it harms three people: the speaker, the listener, and the one spoken about. The damage is not just emotional; the Talmud says it brings death to all three.
Why is lashon hara so severe? When you speak negatively about someone, you bring their faults into the open, making them the focus of attention. Even if what you say is true, it is still lashon hara if it is negative. By verbalizing someone’s shortcomings, you make them more noticeable, both to people and to Hashem. Conversely, when you speak positively, you bring out a person’s goodness, making them more favorable in the eyes of Hashem and others, and you give them strength to do even more good. Compliments and positive words can inspire people to improve and grow.
The word Emor means “say”, but there is a nuance. The Torah could have used the word daber—which also means “speak”. What is the difference? Daber is a command, a strong form of speech, while emor is soft and gentle. The Torah teaches not only to speak, but to speak softly, gently, and with compassion. When you speak kindly, people are more likely to listen and to emulate that gentle speech. This applies to everyone—even those who seem rebellious or difficult. We don’t know the struggles others face. The Alter Rebbe in the Tanya writes that even if you are very religious and do everything right, you should not look down on someone who is less observant. You don’t know their challenges. If you had their struggles, you might not do as well as they do. Therefore, always speak softly and positively to everyone, regardless of your judgment of them.
This idea connects to L’ag baOmer and the period of Sefirat HaOmer. During this time, the students of Rabbi Akiva—great scholars and righteous people—died in large numbers. The Talmud explains that this was because they did not show proper respect to one another—lo nahagu kavod zeh b’zeh. Even though they had their reasons, perhaps thinking they understood their teacher better, it was not acceptable. Respect means tolerating others’ opinions and honoring them, even if you disagree. This is part of the lesson of Emor: speak gently, don’t judge, and don’t bring pain to others.
But what if we make mistakes? We are human, and sometimes we say things we regret. That’s where Pesach Sheni comes in. It teaches that there is always a second chance. Even if you missed an opportunity or made a mistake, you can make up for it. Don’t think it’s too late. The Talmud in Chagigah tells the story of Elisha ben Avuyah, a great sage who left Judaism and was called Acher—“the other one”. He heard a heavenly voice say that everyone could repent except him. Yet, our sages explain that if he had insisted and pushed, even he could have returned. The lesson is that no matter what, we always have a second chance. Even if Hashem seems to say “leave”, don’t listen—push to come back. Hashem’s love is always there, even if we don’t always appreciate it. If we reflect on Hashem’s constant kindness, it will awaken love in our hearts in return.
Let’s look at the first verse in our portion: “And Hashem said to Moshe, speak to the Kohanim, the sons of Aharon, and say to them: Let none of you defile himself for a dead person among his people.” In cemeteries, you may notice that Kohanim stay outside the fence, because they are not allowed to become tamei—ritually impure—by contact with a corpse. The Kohen serves in the Temple and must remain spiritually pure. But what does “among his people” mean? Rashi explains that as long as the dead person is “among his people”—meaning there are others to bury him—the Kohen should not defile himself. But if there is a meis mitzvah—a corpse with no one to bury him—then the Kohen must take responsibility, even if it means becoming impure. My father, of blessed memory, told me that during World War II in Russia, people were dying everywhere, and there was often no one to bury them. He took it upon himself to ensure that Jewish people received a proper burial. This is the concept of meis mitzvah: when no one else can help, it becomes your responsibility, no matter your status or level of holiness.
All the festivals are mentioned in this parsha, including the commandment to count the Omer. The Torah says, “You shall count for yourselves from the morrow of the rest day”. What does “rest day” mean? In this context, it refers to the day after the first day of Passover. There was a debate in the Talmud whether it meant the regular Shabbat or the festival, but here it means the day after Passover. The purpose of counting the Omer is to refine ourselves. The seven weeks from leaving Egypt to receiving the Torah were a time of spiritual growth. Each day, we work on refining a different aspect of our character. When the Jews left Egypt, they had to run away from negativity, but to truly elevate themselves, they needed time and effort to refine their inner qualities. The word usfartem—“you shall count”—also comes from sapir, a precious stone, indicating refinement and shining. We must refine ourselves, and Hashem gives us the strength to do so, helping us become whole and ready to receive the Torah.
Another interesting point: in the middle of the laws of the festivals, the Torah inserts the commandment to leave the corners of your field, forgotten sheaves, and gleanings for the poor. Rashi asks why this is placed among the festivals. The answer is that giving to the poor in this way is considered as if you built the Temple and offered sacrifices. The Rebbe explains that these three types of charity are unique because you have no control over who receives them and get nothing in return. True giving is when it is pure, with no expectation of reward. It’s not about how much you give, but how you give—with the right intention and a full heart.
In summary, today we discussed the importance of speaking kindly and encouraging others, not judging, uplifting people, honoring and respecting each other, and always knowing there is another chance. May we take these lessons to heart and continue to grow in our speech, our actions, and our connection to Hashem and each other.