ב"ה, ט"ז טבת, תשט"ו
ברוקלין.
ברכה ושלום!
במענה על מכתבה מט' טבת, שזה לא כבר נתקבל (וכיון שאין מזכירי כותב צרפתית, אקוה אשר תבין המענה כתוב בלשון הקודש).
על שאלתה כיון שקשה לתת חינוך חרדי לבניהם שי' במקום מושבם עתה, לכן שתי סברות אצלם, שהיא וילידיהם יתיישבו בגעטסהייד ובעלה שי' יהי' במקומם עתה שהוא מקום פרנסתם. או שרק שני ילידיהם הקשישים ישלחו ללמוד בגייטסהעד אף שקשה הדבר מפני גילם הרך לפי ערך.
הנה לדעתי נוטה להסברא השני', כי אין זה סדר חיים שהבעל יהי' במקום אחד והאשה והילדים במקום שני, משא"כ שהילדים יסעו למקום חנוך טוב רגיל הוא ובפרט בשנים האחרונות, ובטח יש למצוא בגעטסהייד בית נאמן שישגיחו על ילידיהם ככל הצורך, ואף שבזמן הראשון יהי' אצלם געגועים הנה אעפ"כ הרי אמרה תורה הוי גולה למקום תורה, ובפרט בדורנו זה שזהו לא רק שאלת ידיעת התורה אלא שאלת ההליכה בדרך התורה והמצוה, ועוד טעם נוסף בדבר אשר כאשר גם היא תהי' ביחד עם בעלה בטח תוכל למצוא אופנים להשפיע על הסביבה לעשותה יותר חרדית.
לפלא שאינה מזכירה ע"ד פעולותי' בהחזקת היהדות במקומם, ובפרט בתוככי הנוער שלבעלה יש השפעה עליהם, ותקותי שאין זה אלא חסרון בכתיבה ולא בהפועל.
והשי"ת ימלא ימי הריונה כשורה ובנקל ותלד זחו"ק בעתה ובזמנה כשורה ובקל.
בברכה,
בשם כ"ק אדמו"ר שליט"א
16 Tevet, 5715 (1955)
Brooklyn,
Blessings and peace!
In response to your letter of 9 Tevet, which was just received, I am writing to you in Hebrew, as the secretaries do not write in French.
Regarding your question about the difficulty in providing a Haredi education for your children in your current place of residence, you suggest two possibilities: either you and your children will settle in Gateshead while your husband remains in his current location for work, or only your two older children will be sent to study in Gateshead, although this may be difficult due to their young age.
In my opinion, the second option is preferable because it is not proper for the husband to be in one place while the wife and children are in another. Rather, it is better for the children to go to a yeshiva in a place like Gateshead, where a reliable family can watch over them as needed. Although there may be some longing at first, the Torah says, "Be an exile in a place of Torah," especially in our generation where it is not only a matter of Torah knowledge but also of living according to Torah values. Additionally, if the wife is with her husband, she can have a greater influence on the surrounding community to make it more Haredi.
It is surprising that you did not mention any actions taken to strengthen Judaism in your current location, especially among the youth who are influenced by your husband. I hope this is simply a lack of detail in your writing and not in your actions.
May God fill your pregnancy with ease and bless you with a healthy child at the proper time.
Blessings, in the name of the Admor Shlita"u (may he live long and well).
Summary:
The letter is a response to a woman's inquiry about providing a Haredi education for her children, which was not available in their current place of residence. The woman suggests two possibilities: either the woman and children move to Gateshead while the husband remains in his current location for work or only the two older children are sent to study in Gateshead. The writer prefers the second option because it is not proper for the husband to be in one place while the wife and children are in another. The writer also encourages the woman to take action to strengthen Judaism in her current location, especially among the youth who are influenced by her husband. The letter concludes with a blessing for an easy pregnancy and a healthy child.
B"H, 16 Tevet, 5715.
Brooklyn.
Blessings and peace!
In response to your letter of 9 Tevet, which was just received (and since my secretaries do not write French, I hope you will understand my reply written in Lashon HaKodesh).
Regarding your question: since it is difficult to provide a Haredi education for your children in your current place of residence, you are considering two options: that you and your children settle in Gateshead while your husband remains where you currently live due to his livelihood; or that only your two older children be sent to study in Gateshead, even though this is difficult because of their young age.
In my opinion, I lean toward the second option, because it is not a proper way of life for the husband to be in one place and the wife and children in another. However, sending the children to a place with good education is common practice—especially in recent years—and surely you can find a trustworthy family in Gateshead who will supervise your children as needed. Even though at first they may feel longing, nevertheless the Torah says: "Hevei golah leMakom Torah" (Be an exile in a place of Torah), especially in our generation when this is not only about knowledge of Torah but also about following the path of Torah and mitzvah. Another reason is that when you are together with your husband, you will surely find ways to influence your environment to make it more Haredi.
It is surprising that you did not mention anything about your activities in supporting Judaism in your current location—especially among the youth whom your husband influences—and I hope this is only an omission in writing and not in action.
May Hashem fill the days of your pregnancy properly and easily, and may you give birth to a healthy child at its proper time with ease.
Blessings, in the name of the Admor Shlita.
Summary
The Rebbe teaches that maintaining family unity takes precedence over moving for children's education. He encourages sending only older children away if needed and stresses influencing one's local community toward greater Jewish observance.