1119 —הסברת פטירת אם לילדים

B"H, 1 Menachem Av, 5711. Brooklyn.

Shalom u'Vrachah!

In due time I received your letter from Lag BaOmer as well as your letters from the 5th and 8th of Tammuz, and I read the pan at the gravesite of my father-in-law, the Rebbe zatzal, to arouse mercy for each and every one mentioned in the pan for what they need. Surely, "a tzaddik who has passed on is found in this world more than during his lifetime," and he will draw down blessing and success for him and all his family in both material and spiritual matters.

2) In response to your question whether to reveal to your children about their mother's passing (of blessed memory), in my opinion you should gradually explain that G‑d has now brought her to a place where there is no illness or pain—a place that exists in heaven—from where she can also influence all her children and pray to the Creator that they succeed in their studies and conduct. Even now, a mother's compassion for her sons and daughters remains strong; she longs for them to behave appropriately as Jewish boys and girls, which brings her great satisfaction. Then she is also able to help ensure their affairs are successful. The only difference is that she cannot be seen with physical eyes, etc. It is self-understood that the words you use when speaking with older children are not suitable for younger ones, but the content according to their level can be similar for all as explained above...

With blessings for a suitable arrangement in good and visible ways very soon.

Summary

The Rebbe teaches that when explaining a parent's passing to children, it should be done gently and age-appropriately—emphasizing ongoing love and spiritual connection from above—so children feel cared for even after loss.