5788 —התנהגות בשלום בתפלה ומנהגים בבתי כנסת שאינם חב"ד

B"H, 8 Tishrei, 5718.

Brooklyn.

HaAvrech Shalom Dovber sh"y.

Shalom u'Vrachah!

...Regarding your question about wearing a tallis and gartel for prayer when praying in a synagogue that does not follow the customs of Anash. It is understood that here too the principle of our Rebbeim applies: strife is hated. If it is possible to also observe the customs of Anash there, obviously in a manner of peace and pleasantness, it is worthwhile to do so; but one should avoid causing disputes over this. This also applies to wearing the tallis gadol, which those mentioned above add to the practice of Anash and their shaliach tzibbur customarily prays wrapped in a tallis—unlike our custom. Since this is an addition, one should concede to fulfill their request and wear the tallis gadol draped over the shoulder specifically. However, regarding the gartel—which they are lacking—it is necessary to make every effort to pray specifically with a gartel.

Especially since this relates to 'Hachon Likrat Elokecha Yisrael' (Prepare to meet your G‑d, O Israel). Regarding the number of candles to be lit before the amud (lectern), it depends on local custom. If the one leading the prayers is a mourner or observing a yahrzeit (G‑d forbid), then during prayer it is appropriate for five candles to be lit—as was said by my revered father-in-law, the Rebbe: after all, five names are given to the soul.

For the wording on a gravestone, they should consult with the elders of Anash in his area.

For the upcoming year may everyone be blessed with a good inscription and sealing for good.

Summary

The Rebbe teaches that maintaining one's customs should always be done peacefully and without causing disputes. When possible, uphold Chabad practices respectfully while accommodating local traditions; seek guidance from community elders for sensitive matters.