10492 —הדרכה על סיום שידוך ודיון בפרטים מעשיים

Guidance on Finalizing a Shidduch and Discussing Practical Details

ה'תשל"ב
The Rebbe writes that the shidduch should be finalized if the parents agree, but to avoid future misunderstandings, practical details such as daily Torah study, location, and names should be discussed explicitly. The Rebbe adds that he will mention them at the Tziyun.
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[ה'תשל"ב]

שלום וברכה!

עפ"ז יגמרו השידוך בשטומו"צ (באם הורי' שי' ג"כ מסכימים ע"ז) – אבל בכדי למנוע שקו"ט לאח"ז – כדאי שידברו לא רק במושגים

כללים

"ע"פ תומ"צ" וכיו"ב – אלא גם בפרטים:

פּאַריק

, שיעור בתורה בכל יום, וכמה, ואיפוא,

וכו'

,

גם כל השמות שלו ואזכיר עה"צ.

Shalom u'Vrachah!

According to what was discussed, the shidduch should be completed in its entirety (if the parents agree to this). However, in order to prevent any misunderstandings afterward, it is advisable that they speak not only in general terms according to custom and so forth, but also about specifics: farak (dowry), daily Torah study—how much, where, etc.—as well as all his names. I will mention them at the Tziyun.


Summary

The Rebbe teaches that when finalizing a shidduch, it is important to clarify practical details beyond general agreements to ensure harmony and understanding. He also offers his prayers at the Tziyun for their success.

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