6538 —הדלקת נרות קודם הנשואין ומשמעותה הרוחנית

B"H, 3rd of Marcheshvan, 5719. Brooklyn.

Miriam, may she live.

Shalom u'Vrachah!

In response to your letter from the 29th of Tishrei, in which you ask about the obligation of lighting candles on Erev Shabbos and Erev Yom Tov before marriage.

In general, there are different customs regarding this: some communities have women begin lighting Shabbos and Yom Tov candles at a very young age, even several years before becoming Bat Mitzvah; other communities have the custom to begin only after marriage.

The custom of Beis HaRav is to begin lighting at a very young age as mentioned.

In any case regarding you—since you have already become Bat Mitzvah and have the ability to fulfill this great mitzvah of lighting candles on Erev Shabbos and Erev Yom Tov with a blessing—it is proper that you do so, bli neder (without making a vow). The reward is explained in the Midrashim of our Sages: that lighting the candle literally adds light to "the candle of G‑d is the soul of man" (Mishlei 20:27), which is the holy soul within every Jew. Through this, there is an increase in all your affairs in fulfilling the mitzvos of Hashem, and from this comes blessing with increase also in your material affairs.

I hope you are involved in spreading Judaism through organizing Shabbos gatherings and similar activities, and that even between gatherings you strive to influence your surroundings to draw hearts closer to our Father in Heaven by fulfilling His commandments. May Hashem grant you success.

With blessing.

Summary

The Rebbe encourages young women—especially after Bat Mitzvah—to begin lighting Shabbos and Yom Tov candles with a blessing, highlighting its spiritual impact on both soul and life. He stresses spreading Judaism through positive influence and mitzvah observance brings both spiritual and material blessings.