10527 —תקופות מעבר, ספקות, וחיזוק תורה ומצוות

It is understood—there is absolutely no basis—for concern in writing to me! My effort is to help as much as I can—not, G‑d forbid, to burden or rebuke, etc.

During transitional periods in a person's life (from childhood to adulthood, from adulthood to independence, etc.), one is more sensitive and less stable. Therefore, it is common that new questions or doubts arise at such times—which will resolve themselves easily once the period passes. But during the transition itself it seems like a major doubt, etc. Through talking with another person it becomes clear that the solution is simple, etc. Therefore what she experiences—as above—is also what others experience and passes with time.

Another significant reason for her feelings: when she began feeling slightly uncomfortable—instead of increasing activities that strengthen her connection to Torah and mitzvos (which is tzt"z), as she wrote—she decreased them! The results are understandable. Even though this decrease came through the enticement of the yetzer hara who argues that according to his calculation she does not deserve such punishment (as she feels), this is contrary to fairness toward G‑d. Therefore she must stop this behavior, etc. And what connection is there between fulfilling tzt"z and her feelings—that observance will help with this?! (And to say it’s a matter of trial—to overcome the yetzer hara—is obvious.) With a little reflection it’s clear this is an enticement from the "old and foolish king": 1) Perhaps it’s a test, as above. 2) The yetzer hara’s calculation that she doesn’t deserve such things—even that calculation is false.

The above connection—as everyone (and certainly she too) believes with simple faith as written in many places and explained—that our Torah is a Torah of kindness meant to benefit a person even in this world—a true good (and therefore sometimes at first it seems difficult to fulfill—but the Torah knows that specifically through this will come greater good later). It’s also clear that the wisdom of Torah is greater and deeper than human intellect—even more so than someone personally involved—so there’s no wonder if sometimes a person doesn’t immediately understand the benefit for himself in this world by following Torah’s guidance (and if people follow a doctor’s instructions even when taking an unpleasant pill—all the more so regarding fulfilling Torah’s directives).

Clarifying her doubts and uplifting her mood should be done specifically through conversation and quiet discussion with a young man about these matters; but as she has already done so several times—according to Torah: it is not desirable or worthwhile for either her or him. From this it’s also understood: 1) It isn’t good for them; 2) She will surely find another permissible way—to achieve what she seeks if she wishes.

Another reason for her feelings (and this too appears in her letter): In all the pages not even one word was mentioned—not even hinted at—about her holy obligation to help others, especially those whose parents did not merit to educate them in the path of tzt"z or inform them about Judaism—even though (as discussed at some length at the farbrengen) they cry out for help—to such an extent has the yetzer hara succeeded in enticing her to focus only on herself and her own feelings. When she involves herself in saving others—even moderately—and with vitality and joy (over her wonderful merit and ability given to her in this), surely her own feelings will improve.

* Many have entered ahead of you (the line has become very long—due to distractions from writing letters about matters of the year of "ayin" [5730s] etc.), but even here you’ll see how the yetzer hara’s explanations are actually contrary to truth. That’s clear.

I will mention you at the gravesite for blessing and success.

Summary

The Rebbe teaches that doubts during transitions are normal but can be overcome by strengthening one's commitment to Torah and mitzvos, focusing on helping others rather than oneself alone, and recognizing misleading arguments from the yetzer hara.