8766 —חששות וסוגיות הלכתיות בנוגע לאימוץ ילדים

B"H, 21 Shevat, 5724. Brooklyn.

Haraha"g Haraha"ch vaharaha"tz Rav Poalim etc. etc. Haran"m shlit"a

Shalom u'Vrachah!

I acknowledge receipt of your letter from the 25th of Teves—which has reached me—where you write about the adoption of a child by... With appreciation and respect and with blessing.

Regarding the general matter of child adoption, it is surprising that until now I have not found anyone who pays attention to what follows. Even though several responsa have already been published detailing various laws stemming from the matter of adoption, no one addresses the core issue itself.

The concerns that have arisen for me are as follows: Adoption in our times is not like in previous generations when fulfilling the mitzvah of raising an orphan in one's home meant that everyone—including the adopted child—knew these were not his parents. Now it is the opposite; every effort is made to conceal this fact. Moreover, under pressure from doctors who claim to be experts in mental health, it is decided that it is forbidden to reveal this to the child (as it may disturb his peace of mind), resulting in behavior toward the adopted child as if he were their biological offspring—with all matters of seclusion, hugging, kissing, etc., occurring daily.

Certainly, it is impossible to be cautious about this even if the adoptive parents are truly G‑d-fearing. And even if they reveal to the adoptee when he grows up that these are not his parents, it is questionable whether it is possible to change conduct established over several years.

According to what was said above—there is certainly a rabbinic prohibition involved here, and according to Rambam also a Torah prohibition. Even regarding a rabbinic prohibition—it is different when it is something repeated again and again (not just a one-time occurrence). (In addition to what is brought and explained in books of Nigleh on this matter—see also Igeres HaTeshuvah by Rabbeinu HaZaken chapter 7.)

Seemingly, based on the above, there are serious questions regarding all aspects of adoption; and as for relying on the rationale "better they be unintentional sinners...", it seems clear that many would refrain from adopting if they knew all this. See also Shulchan Aruch Orach Chaim siman 408 and in Shulchan Aruch Rabbeinu HaZaken there for various parameters regarding "better they be...", which based on this does not make such leniency clear in our case.

Certainly for someone like yourself—lengthy elaboration is unnecessary.

Summary

The Rebbe raises significant halachic and practical concerns about modern child adoption practices—especially secrecy about origins—and urges careful consideration due to possible prohibitions involved.