1. The Significance of Chof Cheshvan and the Rebbe Rashab
This week’s Torah and Tea focuses on Parshas Vayera—the portion of Vayera—and draws from Likkutei Sichos volume 15, specifically the second sicha for the 20th of Cheshvan. The 20th of Cheshvan is the birthday of the Rebbe Rashab, Rabbi Sholom Dov Ber, who was the father of Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak, and thus the grandfather of our Rebbe. This date is significant in Chabad history, as it marks the birth of a leader whose teachings continue to influence us today.
Chassidim often speak about the “Tehillim year”—when you turn a certain age, you begin reciting the chapter in Tehillim that corresponds to your new year. For example, when someone turns 45, they start saying chapter 46. This custom extends even after a person’s passing; we continue to recite their corresponding chapter each year. The Rebbe emphasized that this practice applies not only to ourselves but also to tzaddikim like the Rebbe Rashab. Even though he passed away many years ago, we still mark his birthday by continuing this tradition, reflecting an ongoing spiritual growth that transcends physical life.
The Rebbe Rashab was born in the year Taf-Reish-Chof-Aleph, which would make this his 153rd birthday. This ongoing commemoration highlights the idea that spiritual milestones continue to accumulate and inspire us each year.
2. Avraham’s Mission: Spreading Monotheism
One of Avraham’s greatest achievements was introducing the idea of one G-d—monotheism—to a world steeped in idolatry. While most people at that time were idol worshippers, Avraham recognized and taught that there is only one Creator. He dedicated his life to spreading this truth throughout the world.
The Torah describes Avraham’s efforts with the phrase hanefesh asher asu b’Charan—the souls they made in Charan—indicating that he and Sarah were constantly bringing people closer to Hashem. But what does it mean “to make souls”? Commentaries explain that it refers both to teaching people about Hashem and also providing for their physical needs: food, drink, and shelter.
Avraham would invite travelers into his tent, feed them generously, and then encourage them to thank Hashem for their sustenance rather than thanking him personally. If they refused to bless Hashem, he would ask them to pay for their meal instead—a sum so high that they would ultimately agree to bless Hashem rather than pay.
3. The Value of Mitzvos Done Under Pressure
This story raises an important question: What is the value of a mitzvah performed under pressure or without full intent? If someone only blesses Hashem because they are forced or coerced into it, does it really count?
The Talmud discusses this issue through various examples. Sometimes people do things just to get out of an obligation or because they feel pressured by others. Is there any spiritual value in such actions? The answer is nuanced: While ideally mitzvos should be done with sincerity and understanding, even actions done under duress can have a positive effect.
The Rebbe explains that sometimes pushing someone past their resistance can help break down barriers and allow their true inner self—their neshama—to emerge. Over time, even externally motivated actions can lead to genuine change and connection with Hashem.
4. Breaking Through Spiritual Barriers: Stories from Chazal and Chassidus
A powerful illustration comes from a story in the Talmud about Rebbe Elazar ben Rebbe Shimon who insulted a man by calling him “disgusting.” Deeply hurt, the man replied that if he was truly so repulsive, perhaps Rebbe Elazar should complain to Hashem who created him this way. Realizing his mistake, Rebbe Elazar asked forgiveness.
The deeper meaning behind this story is not about physical appearance but about spiritual state. Sometimes a person is so closed off spiritually that gentle words cannot reach them; only a jarring comment or shock can break through their defenses and awaken something deeper inside them.
A similar lesson emerges from a story about the Rebbe Rashab: A chossid came seeking help but was initially told by the Rebbe “I can’t help you.” This broke down his emotional barriers until he became truly receptive to guidance and blessing when called back in for further conversation.
The message is clear: Sometimes strictness or discomfort is necessary to penetrate protective shells we build around ourselves so our true connection with Hashem can shine forth.
5. The Inner Will: Forcing Mitzvos Reveals True Desire
The Rambam teaches that even if a Jew is forced into performing a mitzvah but ultimately says “I want to do it,” we consider it as coming from their true will. Every Jew has an inner desire for connection with Hashem; external resistance is just a superficial layer hiding this truth.
This principle applies not only to Jews but also extends in some measure to non-Jews as well—everyone has potential for spiritual growth and recognition of Hashem, though sometimes layers must be peeled away before this potential can be realized.
This perspective encourages us not to give up on outreach or on inviting others into Jewish experiences just because they seem uninterested or resistant at first glance. Many people have begun journeys toward Torah observance from one small act performed under pressure or curiosity—a single Seder invitation or putting on tefillin once can spark lifelong change.
6. Endless Growth: Torah Study Versus Mitzvah Performance
The birthday of the Rebbe Rashab reminds us of another profound teaching: Torah study never ends while mitzvah performance is limited by time and circumstance. The Talmud states that scholars never rest—not in this world nor in Gan Eden—because there are always new levels of Torah learning available both here and beyond.
Mitzvos are generally limited to this world since after passing away one cannot perform new mitzvos anymore. Each mitzvah also has its boundaries: lighting Shabbos candles must be done before Shabbat begins; eating matzah belongs on Pesach; shaking lulav is for Sukkos alone.
However, while each individual mitzvah has limits, our overall life should always be filled with mitzvos—a constant connection with Hashem through action as well as study. The essence of every mitzvah is not just its specific details but its role as an opportunity for divine connection (tzavta—bonding). Thus both Torah study and mitzvah observance offer endless opportunities for growth and closeness with Hashem throughout our lives.
7. Personal Reflections on Sacrifice and Flexibility in Life Choices
Toward the end of our session today, we shifted into some personal reflections about life choices such as pursuing shlichus&mdash>a life dedicated to outreach work versus other paths like business or nonprofit work. There was discussion about flexibility versus commitment when considering marriage partners who may have different visions for their future roles within Jewish communal life.
The conversation highlighted how important it is both to have passion for making a difference in the world and also readiness for sacrifice when pursuing meaningful goals like shlichus. It’s not always easy—sometimes financial security isn’t guaranteed—but being open-minded while maintaining core values allows us to navigate these decisions thoughtfully.
This dialogue also touched on dating dynamics within our community: balancing practical concerns (like finances) with deeper aspirations (such as building a home centered around giving and purpose). Ultimately, success comes from being honest about what matters most while remaining flexible enough to adapt as circumstances evolve.
8. Concluding Thoughts: Connection Through Torah and Mitzvos
In closing, we are reminded that our ultimate purpose is serving Hashem through both learning Torah and doing mitzvos—each offering unique ways to connect with our Creator and fulfill our mission in life. Whether through persistent outreach efforts or personal sacrifice for higher ideals, every step brings us closer to revealing our own inner goodness and helping others do likewise.
I hope everyone has a wonderful week ahead filled with good news and continued growth in Torah learning and mitzvah observance!