1. The Meaning of Menachem Av
Today and tonight mark Rosh Chodesh—the beginning of the new month. While some refer to this month simply as Av, we customarily call it Menachem Av. Literally, menachem means “to comfort,” and av means “father.” The father in question is HaKadosh Baruch Hu—the Holy One, blessed be He. What does it mean to comfort our Father? The idea is rooted in the concept that when Hashem sends us into exile, He does not remain aloof but actually joins us in our suffering. He does not banish us from His table and stay behind; rather, He accompanies the Jewish people into exile.
This is learned from the verse that says Hashem will return together with our return—when Hashem brings us out of exile, He Himself emerges from exile as well. Thus, when the Jewish people experience hardship, it is not only their suffering but Hashem’s as well. Hashem is with us in our sorrow.
2. The Nine Days: Customs and Intensified Mourning
The period known as the Nine Days marks an intensification of mourning for the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash—the Holy Temple. This mourning begins with the Three Weeks but becomes more serious starting from Rosh Chodesh Av. From tonight, certain customs are observed: we refrain from drinking wine and eating meat (except at a siyum—a celebration marking the completion of Torah study). We also do not wash clothing or take haircuts during these days, practices that are observed with greater stringency once the Nine Days begin.
The Rebbe instituted that during the Three Weeks we should study about building the Beis Hamikdash. During the Nine Days specifically, he encouraged making a siyum each day or night—not for the sake of eating meat or drinking wine, but to add positivity and holiness during this time of national sadness. The Rebbe always sought to transform every situation into an opportunity for spiritual growth.
3. Hashem’s Shared Sorrow and Hidden Goodness
The mourning reaches its peak during the week of Tisha B’Av itself, culminating on Tisha B’Av night and day. As we enter this period, it is important to recognize that Hashem Himself shares in our pain. The Gemara in Berachos states explicitly that Hashem laments over having exiled His children and destroyed His own house—the Beis Hamikdash. Hashem does not desire to bring misfortune upon anyone, certainly not upon His only son—the Jewish people.
This suffering is described as a form of hidden goodness (chesed nistar). Sometimes we must recognize our shortcomings and improve ourselves so that we can merit the third Beis Hamikdash. As taught by the B’ar Ditchever Rebbe regarding Shabbos Chazon—the Shabbos before Tisha B’Av—we are given a vision of what could be: seeing the future Temple through Yeshayahu’s prophecy.
4. Comforting Our Father: Our Role in Redemption
The name Menachem Av hints at our role: comforting our Father in Heaven. How do we do this? By learning Torah, davening with sincerity, performing mitzvos, practicing Avis Yisrael—love for one another—and treating each other with kindness. In doing so, we comfort Hashem by showing Him that His children are striving to improve and shorten His time in exile alongside us.
The way to be Menachem Av is truly up to us. Through positive action and unity among Jews, we hasten both our own redemption and Hashem’s redemption from exile. Our efforts inspire divine mercy upon all of Klal Yisrael—especially those in Eretz Yisrael and those serving as soldiers—that they should be protected and cared for.
5. Mutual Comfort: Awaiting Redemption Together
The relationship between Hashem comforting us and us comforting Him is reciprocal: “Menachem Tzion”—“Hashem comforts Zion.” As we say on Tisha B’Av, there is a mutual consolation between Hashem and His people. Ultimately everything rests in Hashem’s hands—nothing can prevent Him from bringing redemption when He so desires.
If Hashem longs to be comforted by our actions, then surely He can bring about that comfort swiftly. We hope that through increased Avis Yisrael, kindness, Torah study, prayer, and mitzvos during these days, we will merit to see Menachem Av fulfilled: that Hashem will comfort us with the coming of Mashiach, rebuilding of the third Beis Hamikdash, and eternal joy for all Israel—Simcha Tzion. May it happen speedily this very Tisha B’Av.